What’s your biggest baddest habit? It could be related to communication or otherwise. For me, it’s doubting I’ll know what to say in the moment—without rehearsing it to death first. This is a classic perfectionist tendency, and it’s something I’ve been working on for a long time.
Because I grew up in an opera family (my Dad was a director and often pulled me on stages for non-singing roles), I feel comfortable performing. But when the goal is to CONNECT with your audience (hint: this is always your goal), performing does not help. In fact, performing prevents you from connecting with your audience. It’s the biggest blocker of authenticity, and it’s what derails so many otherwise captivating public speakers.
Just like with any habit, once we are aware of it, we have a choice to do something different.
I was at a yoga training last weekend in Brussels. It was not a retreat; it was a training. I highlight this word because I was NOT relaxed. In fact, I was often stressed that the teacher (a very seasoned teacher who used to be a student of Martha Graham) would come to my mat and point out my bad habits—of which I have many. Curved lumbar spine in downward dog. Splayed wrists in plank. Hyper-extended arms in warrior one. I have been doing yoga for over 20 years, but I have not been tending to my bad habits.
I didn’t realize it until this training, but the reason why I do yoga is to burn away these bad habits—not just the habits in my yoga practice, but the bad habits in the rest of my life too.
Yoga reminds me that I have a choice.
I can succumb to my samskaras, my habits that have formed from my repeated thoughts, actions, and experiences, or I can choose another way.
In my public speaking practice, my samskaras keep me small. Thoughts like “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” my actions like over-rehearsing, my experiences like blanking out on stage (I tell this story in the video below), influence how I show up. But I am conscious of them, and I am exercising my will to change them with every speaking opportunity I get.
What about you? What are your public speaking samskaras? And how are you working with them to develop not only your professional, but also your spiritual growth and well-being? I’d love to hear your experience.
THE BIG PRINT: i.e. If you take one thing away from this post it’s that…
Awareness of your habits gives you the power to choose authenticity over perfectionism.
3 Tips to Transform Your Public Speaking Samskaras
- Notice your speaking rituals – Are you over-rehearsing? Avoiding eye contact? Rushing through your content? Awareness is the first step to change.
- Practice the pause – When you feel the urge to fall into old patterns (like over-preparing or self-doubt), take a breath and ask: “What would it feel like to speak directly to one person in the audience rather than performing for everyone?”
- Reframe “mistakes” as moments of humanity – Your audience connects with your realness, not your perfection. A stumble or pause can actually draw people closer to you.
TAKE IT FROM… Paramahansa Yogananda, an Indian and American Hindu monk, yogi and guru who introduced millions to meditation and Kriya Yoga.
“You must conquer habit by cultivating opposite habits. If you have a tendency to be lazy, start doing things now. Don’t wait. That is how you will develop a dynamic will.” —Paramahansa Yogananda
Yogananda spread the teachings of yoga to the West in the early 20th century. It was through his simple lifestyle and principled thinking that he attracted people looking for balance and spirituality in the face of Western materialism. His advice? Don’t wait. Develop a dynamic will by choosing a different way of expressing yourself now.
What’s one self-expression habit you want to change? What’s one action you can take today to shift it? This work of transforming our samskaras isn’t always easy to do alone.
If you need support, my programs and coaching can help. Book a free call with me here to learn more.
Join a community of like-minded individuals committed to mastering the art of communication, stepping into leadership, and being authentic along the way.
By signing up for my newsletter at rebecca-williams.com, you’ll gain exclusive access to:
✅ Special DOJO Invites: Exclusive access to select Public Speaking DOJO sessions with live coaching and guest speakers.
✅ Early Access & Discounts: Be the first to know about workshops, courses, and events—plus subscriber-only deals.
✅ Access to my “What’s Marinating” List: Discover what’s sparking my creativity—from thought-provoking articles and books to must-listen podcasts and fresh ideas that keep me inspired.
You’ll be in good company with thousands of other savvy professionals on a mission to develop their communication skills—the fun way.
Sign up here and see you on the inside!